The Primrose Perspective...
Each of Us a Drummer Boy
My Drummer Boy Christmas

Over the last couple of years, I have been asking Father God to make Christmas truly meaningful to me. I realized that closing the door to feelings had turned me into a bit of a Scrooge and I didn’t like it at all. That’s the trouble with blocking our emotions and feelings, we don’t get to select which ones get blocked and which don’t. If we block one, we block them all. I was determined to open the door as far as I was able and experience life, especially Christmas, fully. I had no idea what I was about to experience!
Last year, at the beginning of December, I was invited to serve at Randy Clark’s School of Supernatural Ministry with Trisha Frost and the Shiloh Place Ministry team. During my time there, God began to soften my heart. I found I was truly enjoying the celebration as the world, both Christian and secular, prepared for Christmas day. Shopping, something I had come to dread, became a real joy as I looked around at people hurrying here and there. I began to realize that God was answering my prayer and was thrilled. So far, no big deal, right? But just wait.
The last day of the conference just happened to coincide with the day the students left for Christmas break and the school was pulling out all the stops. Each year the school holds a candlelight service for its students before sending them off. I had experienced it before but this time it was especially meaningful for me. The worship leaders began by singing For King and Country’s rendition of “The Little Drummer Boy.” It’s a song I have grown up hearing and it never meant anything special to me. I remember singing it in grade school but I was never touched in the way I was last year. On the first note, for some reason, I began to cry buckets of tears! I mean I was ugly crying! Tears poured down my cheeks as I considered the rag-tag little boy standing before the Son of God, fully understanding who Jesus was, yet bereft of anything to give Jesus. Somehow God allowed me to see myself in that situation. What in the world could I ever bring the Son of God that could ever be a worthy gift? I had nothing. I was poor as the drummer boy and for years had never realized how similar I was to him. My tears continued to flow throughout the rest of the service. I can’t really say why. They weren’t sad tears or happy tears. I think more than anything they were tears of awe at the heart of God revealed in the gift of His Son and even as I write this blog they are returning.
I believe with all my heart Christ wanted to come to this world and would have if the choice was His, but it wasn’t. The choice was entirely His Father’s. This year I want to challenge each of you to consider the sacrifice God made in sending us the precious gift of His Son. We had nothing to give Him in return. We most certainly didn’t earn the gift and never could. There is nothing about us that warrants such a gift and nothing we could ever do to repay it. It was simply a gift. Nothing expected in return. For me, it continues to be tears of gratitude, but what will you do in the face of such unconditional love? My prayer is that as you look into this love, you too will find the Drummer Boy in you.
